The other day I had a really good discussion with a couple people following on from my previous blog post: ‘Christianity, The Church and Homosexuality’. If you haven’t read it yet, I’d recommend you do before reading this blog, as it sets the scene, and covers things that I won’t be addressing here. This is a follow on blog in light of some of what came up in that discussion, including (fairly prominently) the danger of ‘political correctness’.
One important lesson that I’m grateful for, is that in a discussion it can be very helpful to have a mix of view points on the issue being discussed. While it is important to be encouraged by those who have the same or similar views as you, to have people who don’t agree with you on every point helps you to see things that you may have otherwise missed.
Extreme Political Correctness
Political correctness is a theme that came up a number of times. In this case being pc involves the topics of equality, fairness and not offending people. While these all have value, they can be and are taken to extremes, especially when dealing with controversial issues. We cannot allow an atmosphere of extreme political correctness to shape us. While a good measure of it can help, in excess it is very damaging. We in the west, as a society, live in an age where political correctness is running riot in my areas, whether it be health and safety or more recently equality in marriage.
My journey of finding a thoroughly considered stand point on homosexuality and gay marriage is still in progress. I’ve found that because I love reading as a means of learning, I need to be careful not to read too much. What I mean by that, as someone pointed out to me, is that you can end up with a head full of other people’s thoughts on an issue and not have any thoughts or opinions of your own. While I do feel that I have given myself time to process what I’ve been reading, I need to give more time to allow for my own opinions and thoughts to form, otherwise I’ll just end up fence sitting between various other people’s thoughts and opinions. It’s good to be able to reference what others have said, but to have thoughts and opinions of your own is very important too.
In my effort to try to be more understanding towards/of those who don’t see anything wrong with homosexuality and gay marriage, I’ve found that I’ve come too close to compromising my beliefs for the sake of not offending people (falling into the trap of extreme political correctness). A friend pointed out to me the other day, the Gospel is actually quite offensive (on some level), so you can’t be afraid of offending people when sharing it. This doesn’t mean that it’s ok to be offensive in the way you share it, [as we are called to 'speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15)] , cos it’s not, but to allow the truth of Jesus to be what affends, (not you) as the saying goes’ the truth hurts’. Also the Bible clearly states that Jesus is ‘The Truth’ – John 14:6, and ‘God’s word is truth’ – John 17:17.
1 Corinthians 1:18-21 says:
’18 For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 19 For it is written:
“I will destroy the wisdom of the wise;
the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate.”
20 Where is the wise person? Where is the teacher of the law? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? 21 For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe.’
And in Romans 11:33-36
’33 Oh, how great are God’s riches and wisdom and knowledge! How impossible it is for us to understand his decisions and his ways!
34 For who can know the Lord’s thoughts?
Who knows enough to give him advice?[a]
35 And who has given him so much
that he needs to pay it back?[b]
36 For everything comes from him and exists by his power and is intended for his glory. All glory to him forever! Amen.’
Footnotes:
11:34 Isa 40:13 (Greek version).
11:35 See Job 41:11.
Also in Isaiah 55:8-9
’8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. 9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.’
”What’s wrong with two people who love each getting married irrespective of their gender?”
If your argument is, “what’s wrong with two people who love each getting married irrespective of their gender?”, then on that same bases what’s to stop the legislation of marriage between biological siblings or between 3 or 4 people who ‘love each other’. Some might argue that this is what’s called, ’Reductio ad absurdum’ [a term I learnt from Sheldon in 'The Big Bang Theory' ![:-)]()
], which is when an argument is taken to an absurd level to argue against it’s validity. But I would say that’s not the case here, and why I specifically chose those examples instead of, “if that’s your stance what’s to stop the legislation of marriage between someone aged 40 to someone aged 14, just because they, ‘love each other’? , or even to go as far as to say, ’well on that basis, why not legalise marriage between an owner and his or her pet, because they ‘love each other’? God has a design for sexuality and for marriage and it is sacred, to try and justify anything outside of that using human wisdom, devoid of guidance from God’s wisdom, is dangerous. God is our creator, he knows and loves us completely and perfectly, so in fact it is beneficial and important that ultimately we live by his wisdom and not our own. I get that to some this may sound like arrogance and a holier than thou type attitude, but I would simply state that this is not me saying that my opinion is better than yours, I’m not saying I’m right and your wrong, or saying I’m wiser than you; what I’m saying is that the authority that I am trying to live my life under (but messing up from time to time, as we all do), is higher than Both of us.
], which is when an argument is taken to an absurd level to argue against it’s validity. But I would say that’s not the case here, and why I specifically chose those examples instead of, “if that’s your stance what’s to stop the legislation of marriage between someone aged 40 to someone aged 14, just because they, ‘love each other’? , or even to go as far as to say, ’well on that basis, why not legalise marriage between an owner and his or her pet, because they ‘love each other’? God has a design for sexuality and for marriage and it is sacred, to try and justify anything outside of that using human wisdom, devoid of guidance from God’s wisdom, is dangerous. God is our creator, he knows and loves us completely and perfectly, so in fact it is beneficial and important that ultimately we live by his wisdom and not our own. I get that to some this may sound like arrogance and a holier than thou type attitude, but I would simply state that this is not me saying that my opinion is better than yours, I’m not saying I’m right and your wrong, or saying I’m wiser than you; what I’m saying is that the authority that I am trying to live my life under (but messing up from time to time, as we all do), is higher than Both of us.Spiritual Consequences
It was pointed out / highlighted to me that there are spiritual consequences to the things we allow and the stands which we make. If we compromise on God’s design, we end up opening the door to serverely damaging consequences.
Ephesians 6:12
New International Version (NIV)
‘For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.’
So often we can get caught up with trying to win people over to our way of thinking through discussion and debate, that we miss out on where the source of victory is truly found, which is in meeting with God in prayer, placing our trust in him and submitting to his rule and reign in our lives:
Proverbs 3:5-6
New International Version (NIV)
’5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.[a]
Footnotes:
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Proverbs 3:6 Or will direct your paths’
This may sound oppressive, but if you balance it with the truth that God knows and loves us completely and perfectly, that he is the one who designed us, created us and breathed life into us – it is actually The Most freeing thing in the world! God is a wise and loving Father on a whole new level, who not only wants what’s best for us, but knows what’s truly best for us and has what is needed in order to make it happen; that is why our complete trust must ultimately be in him. To do this isn’t easy, and to get to that place involves a journeying process, which God knows/understands and encourages.
Idolising Sex and Sexuality
Probably the biggest reason why sexuality is such an emotive and controversial topic, is that we live in a society which idolises sex and sexuality. To place your identity so firmly in your sexuality, means that if someone has a different view of sexuality to you, it’s more than likely that you we will feel like they are attacking who you are, whenever they make a stand on their view point. I find what Tim Keller has to say about idolatry very helpful:
“Idolatry is anything you look at, and in your heart of hearts, you say to it, “If I had that, then my life has value!”.
Any life that’s not build on God’s glory and his grace, is gonna be built on the deification of something else, it’s gonna be built on turning something into a pseudo saviour, some way in which you save yourself without having to go to God, so you can think your keeping control of your life, but your really not.
Your gods will always let you down, that’s the point, these gods will never bring you what you think. The only way you’ll be free from idols in your life, is if your ravished with him, “Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!” You Have to experience him, that’s what Christianity is, it’s not just an abstract truth, or just a mystical experience , it’s an experience of truth. Because the Truth became a person, and now relationship is the way in which the truth comes in. Your no longer up there looking and saying yes, there’s the religious and the irreligious, the good and and the bad. No, No, No, there’s the people who are trying to save themselves through idols and the people who have finally given themselves to Jesus, that’s the only two kinds of people in the world.
My dear friends, you have already got incredible faith, you couldn’t be living without putting your faith in something, it’s not Jesus, that’s all, what is it? It’s your career or it’s your sexual attractiveness or it’s something. And all I can tell you is, those gods, if you fail them, will never forgive you and if you get them they’ll never satisfy you.
This is the only God who will, Jesus and the resurrection.’
We All Have Worth
There is so much more to us than our sexual orientation. Everyone has value, worth and importance, but it doesn’t lie in our sexuality, our job, how we look, or anything other than the fact that we have a creator who knows and loves us completely, who designed us, and wants and truly knows (more than we or anyone else ever could) what’s best for us. God places so much value in who we are (becoming), that it hurts him when he sees us making choices that he knows to be damaging. Ultimately we need to come to a place of putting our trust in God’s wisdom, we cannot completely understand everything he will do, I’m not saying never ask questions, as questioning is important, but if we don’t (eventually) submit to God despite our uncertainties, we will be missing out. It’s important to engage our minds as well as our hearts, but it’s important that we accept the fact that God’s ways and thoughts are higher than ours, than anyone’s, which isn’t an arrogance thing, he’s God. We all have a choice, whether to honour God with our lives or not. God sees our hearts, so it’s not the case that if we mess up from time to time (which we all do), he’s just gona get angry with us. If our heart is to submit to and follow him, he will honour that, he will help us – not in our way or timing (necessary), but as it says in Romans 8:28:
‘And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.’
That’s not saying everything will be good, but that God is able to bring good out of bad situations. Sometimes God allows (not causes), bad things to happen in order to shape us. Some of the greatest lessons we learn are when we are faced with difficult times and how we respond to them. This is why community is so important, but that’s another subject.
Also 2 Peter 3:9 says:
‘The Lord isn’t really being slow about his promise to return, as some people think. No, he is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to perish, so he is giving more time for everyone to repent.’
God’s Design
For someone to choose to give into a desire to sleep around, be unfaithful to their spouse, or sleep with anyone other than their husband or wife (heterosexually speaking), is just as outside of God’s design for sexuality as giving into a desire to be romantically involved with someone of the same-sex. I know that sounds harsh and will get a lot of people’s backs up. I get that there are most likely many homosexual couples who are far more faithful to their partner than many heterosexual couples. But the issue here isn’t faithfulness with ones other half, although that is important and commendable where it’s evident, the issue here is God’s design.
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